So I guess I'll join in and give my two cents about my feelings on "The Return". Let's get one thing straight- Not once did I ever want a pure nostalgia trip or a flashier remake of the first season just with a new "dead girl". I wasn't expecting the show to open or end with Coop eating Cherry Pie at the Double R 25 years later with Audrey and Norma & Shelly cheering them on with pom-poms. I knew this would be something darker, something vicious- I knew Lynch was going to take the world of Twin Peaks and bring it into 2017 with a harsh awakening and I was ready for it. I love the over the top soapy moments in the original series, I even fall for some of them, but I love the horror beyond as well. Twin Peaks is frightening as it is beautiful and I was excited to see Lynch & Frost bring that to us completely unfiltered and unrestricted. So no, the brutality displayed this season didn't bother me, the huge body count I enjoy, I liked the mayhem. I was perfectly fine with that. I imagine the original series would've been a lot more vulgar if it hadn't been on Primetime TV. So all of this I was perfectly fine with and HAPPY with.
What I wasn't happy with was the fact that the entire project came off as if it was cooked up originally because Lynch & Frost were sitting around and coming up with a list of actors- big or small- they'd love to work with and when that giant list was finished they decided to write an overly long, nonsensical story around that and then threw in their favorite bands to boot. Maybe even that's giving them too much credit. Characters appear and disappear, narrative dead ends abound, no one seems important not even Cooper, 7 minutes of screen time wasted on a dude sweeping a floor, 5 on someone painting shovels, 6 on a dumb blonde trying to swat a fly, spending the whole season of a show called "Twin Peaks" in Las Vegas and South Dakota for plotlines that really don't matter, 200 new characters introduced with none mattering, oldies being set up for great development but being left as glorified cameos(What? Shelly Married Bobby who's a deputy and now she has a troubled daughter who's being led down a dark path by her junky of a husband and Shelly herself is dating some magical psychopathic drug dealer named Red? Should we dig into that? Nah, more pressing matters at hand- like hearing about how Gordon Cole can still get it up.), Norma and Ed finally getting together after all these years but you don't give a crap because it just came out of nowhere, Audrey survives an explosion and is raped by dopplecoop and gives birth to a complete nut for a son but only shows up to be a nagging old shrew who dances and disappears. Oh yeah, was that even Audrey? Is the real Audrey trapped? Where has she been for the last 25 years? Oh who cares- let's have a ten minute sex scene of Diane- I've been waiting a quarter of a century for that.
As others have said, Lynch could have still "deconstructed" the show and gave his "fuck you!" to the tradionalists WITHOUT making himself look like a fool in the process. I was neutral, I had no expectations, I was open- and I still was very disappointed. I actually loved the first two episodes- I thought they were wonderfully dark, scary, foreign, and a great cold opening to the show...but every thing after has been a huge fumble. We should've been 100% back in Twin Peaks by episode 6 and it still could've been disturbing, twisted, and still Twin Peaks. That's what I find so frustrating about The Return, with some tweaks it could be half-way decent. You have a huge cast of talented actors, you have Amanda Seyfried for crying out loud, and yet no one truly matters. The Mitchum Brothers and the gals grew on me, but couldn't we just have had the Casino in or on the outskirts of Twin Peaks? Maybe tie them to Red? Couldn't Janey-E have been a Twin Peaks resident? Couldn't Cole, Albert, and Tammy come to town much earlier? Couldn't all of these characters actually have been tied together well? You were partially there with the Bobby/Shelly/Becky/Steven/Red/Richard connections. I see absolutely no point in the multiple-locations beyond perhaps the first few episodes of following Bad Coop. If I had the energy and the desperation- I'd indulge in a little fan fiction but I rather focus on my own work. I agree that at the end of the day, we should take our disappointments and put the pain into our own art. Don't like someone else's? Make your own. The Return wasn't a complete waste as it did inspire me and there were things I did enjoy- but as others have said the show is basically mini vignettes. I for one loved the scene at the end of episode 15 with Ruby crawling on the floor of the roadhouse and screaming her head off as the band plays that chilling tune- Beautiful, haunting, and just makes me go "Damnit Lynch, if only this scene was in an actually good show."
Also, can we admit that there is a lot of good TV out there these days? TV is where its at. I'm annoyed with people acting as if "The Return" is the only "good"(ha) thing on television. Yet those same people claim to not watch much TV. lol
The Return does not tarnish the original series for me because it is so far removed its not even funny. Nothing could EVER tarnish the original show- its been too long and its foundation has been set, so nothing that comes after- good or bad, can change that. So I can watch my Twin Peaks complete series and Fire Walk With Me Blu-ray and never have to feel bothered about leaving The Return out of it.
Season 4? No thanks. I don't see myself tuning in. Perhaps if they decided to basically chalk the entirety of season 3 up to being a dream and then have season 4 actually about a town, you know, called Twin Peaks rather than a bizarre Gordon Cole wet dream- but that will never happen so I'm absolutely fine with "How's Annie?!" being the last word on Twin Peaks.